You Taught Me
December 20, 2003
You taught me about love
And yet I can't love you anymore
You taught me about trust
And yet I can't trust you anymore.
I felt it grow as I got to know you, as you brought me into your world
I saw you tell others the same secrets you told me
I saw you woo so many women into your bed
I saw you give your love to them, proclaim them your wifey, the next mother of your children
I saw you give them everything I ever wanted from you
But you never gave it to me.
I remember the dark times, when my father lay dying, and you weren't there
I remember the dark times, when I out on the streets, and you weren't there
I remember the dark times, when I quit the drugs, and you weren't there
But I was always there, whatever you needed, it was yours
I loved you wholey and unconditionally
You were my mentor, you were my guide, I vested so much trust in you because you made me feel
Special and safe, and someone, and loved.
But you gave that to everyone, it was part of your charm. So how do you expect me to believe that when you said it to me, it was the truth?
And then I saw the angle that would make me special
The only female you didn't sleep with
Your sister, no longer your lover.
But it didn't work, through my weakness, or your charms, I couldn't shake you - even though I kept screaming out a silent NO!
I'm sorry, you represent everything that's wrong with me, I'm sorry, that's just the way I see things
You are the absense in my life where love should have been.