February 22, 2004
Once, twice, there's your voice
Such a lie
It was a recording
I didn't have the balls to say
"I need you"
So I hung up
And put a mark by your name
But it wasn't your fault you were on the train
At the precise moment I tried to reach out.
I will not tell you that I need you
That even though you hurt me
Time and time again
I miss you
Almost called you, almost told you
Almost emailed you, almost showed you
But it's not your fault, I told you I hated you
I kicked you when you were down. Why would you want to reconcile?
I will not let you know
I wont admit it... somehow I was wrong
Because it wasn't my fault you couldn't give me what I needed
And it wasn't your fault I never told you what I wanted.
I want to reach out, I want to love, I want to be normal
I want to be human, I want to be loved, I want to be popular
And I wont tell you
How much it hurts that I've done this to myself
That I can't seem to clean up this mess...